...because they have a nasty bite.
Lava snarks are weird, no question. They're kind of like a collie-sized lizard that glows in the dark, an angry, red-orange glow, with black, leathery skin around the edges. Their bite is acidic, so it burns like fire if they bite you. Their body heat is higher than a Human's, too, so they feel hot to the touch.
Lava snarks look for all the world like a lizard made out of glowing red lava when you see them in a dark cave, and their temperament is somewhere at the deep, dark end of snarky. Foul, in other words. Only a Reptiloid could get along with one, because the Snarks can't bite through their scales. And seriously, you SO don't want to smell their breath. It's as close to the Godzilla movies as I've seen a living creature get.
John C got his left butt cheek chomped by one not long after he got here. It's still got a small dent in it from the acid, and all the gals get depressed just thinking about it. He couldn't sit for a couple of weeks, and it was another week after that before I had to wait for him to get done in the tinfoil shack.
Lava snarks do, however, make a great night-light if you can catch and skin one of the little monsters. The glow lasts for several weeks on their hide.
Maybe someday, a Human with welder's gloves might be able to tame a Snark pup, but for now, we've all got too much on our hands trying to dodge Reptiloids and keep food in our mouths. Some days, it feels like we're all slowly going batshit-crazy in these Peruvian bat caves.
Where's my tinfoil umbrella? I need to get out of here for a little bit.
Brad Wonder out.
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